I am a woman of the same generation as Dr. Ford and I remember trains. That's right, trains in fraternity houses where boys waited on line for their turn with a girl who was so wasted she often had no idea what was going on. They were frat house lore and luckily I only came across an actual one in a bedroom at a frat party where I boy I knew said "We need you to get out of here."
As a survivor of more than one sexual assault, I understand Dr. Ford's reluctance to come forward and the trail of fear that follows you for the rest of your life. There will be a moment when you feel trapped and panic swallows you, an unexpected touch on a train when you realize how vulnerable you are. Like Dr. Ford I also ran into a boy who assaulted me in college, at dinner on my birthday with my father and a close friend. I could barely function and of course I never told anyone why.
And then there is this moment in time, first #MeToo as they brought down powerful men who were serial abusers, and now as Brett Kavanaugh cries in anger that a woman would remember what he did to her and talk about it. He is indignant and repugnant and he does not deserve to be on the Supreme Court.
I've had years of therapy and it struck me yesterday that I never told a single therapist about any sexual assault. That's how deeply we bury what hurts us the most.
Dr. Ford you are my hero. You are the voice of every female survivor and we are so proud of you. Don't let them get to you. Your bravery is an inspiration to all of us.
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